Austin’s Ramblings

Tag: life

  • 3 Point Shooter

    This week has been a wake-up call.


    The contrast between being immersed in God’s Word and settling into spiritual complacency is sharper than I expected. For the first time in a long while, I’ve felt a deep and lingering sense of separation—not only from God, but from my wife, my friends, and, to be honest, from myself. I’m home, but it doesn’t feel like home. And that’s no fault of my wife. Abigail is truly extraordinary. She brings light into my life, and I treasure her more than I could ever adequately express. She is my greatest earthly blessing.

    Yet even surrounded by love, I’ve felt isolated.

    This isn’t an unfamiliar feeling. I was diagnosed with depression at 18 and wore that identity for years—perhaps even found a strange comfort in it. From ages 18 to 23, I leaned into the label. It gave me a reason to disengage, to wallow, to stay numb. In some twisted way, I believed depression loved me back. It was always there.

    But over time, I came to understand something powerful: I have agency.


    For me—and I know this is not universal—depression became a choice. Not in the sense that I willed it away easily, but in the sense that I could choose how to respond to it. I chose to reclaim control of my thoughts, to stop accepting that I “suck” or that I’m undeserving of joy. Because that’s a lie. I am worthy of love, of joy, of peace.

    So why this week? Why the shadows again? Why the weight?

    I don’t know yet. Maybe it’s muscle memory—old habits trying to claw their way back. Maybe it’s spiritual fatigue. Maybe it’s the result of drifting just far enough from the presence of God to remember what distance feels like.

    But here’s what I do know:

    “You can’t control what happens to you. You can only control how you respond.”

    It’s a quote I love (even if Abigail rolls her eyes every time I say it). And it’s true. Life will throw mud. The world will bruise. But I can choose joy. I can choose to smile through the mess, thank the world for the “mud bath,” and keep walking in grace. #HealthySkin or something like that.

    Honestly? I don’t believe depression has a grip on me anymore. It doesn’t own me. I’ve walked a long, broken road to discover that Jesus is the answer to my loneliness, my sorrow, my joy, my love, and everything in between.

    I live a life I don’t deserve—and yet, paradoxically, a life I do deserve. I deserve love. I deserve joy. I deserve my wife, my family, my home, my friends. Not because I’ve earned them, but because Christ has declared me worthy. He loved me first. He loved me most. He died on a sinner’s cross so that I might walk freely in the abundance of grace. That truth changes everything.

    So yes, my life is imperfect. It’s messy, complicated, and full of contradictions. But it is also beautiful. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

    My goal? To live a life not centered on myself, but on others. To love my neighbor, to love my Lord, and to reflect Christ in how I walk, talk, and live. If I can embody even half of what I know to be true, then I believe I’ll live a life worthy of hearing those words I long for:

    “Well done, my good and faithful servant.”

    That is my heart’s desire. And in that mission, there’s no room for depression to take root.

    So if no one’s told you today—I love you. You matter. You are seen. And above all else, God loves you more than you can comprehend.

    — Austin B. Grant

  • Ramblings v.1

    While the photo has nothing to do with my next post, it was sent to my wife and she loved it. Therefore – you get to love it as well ( no pressure ).

    Change of Course

    I never imagined I’d be writing this. And while I somewhat despise that I’m “hopping on the Charlie Kirk wave,” it genuinely sparked something deep within me—something that’s changed the course of this blog.

    What began as a space for documenting my weight loss journey is now shifting into something more personal, raw, and meaningful. It’s becoming a place to share my thoughts, prayers, and feelings—a creative outlet to express myself fully and freely. My hope and prayer is that, through this, I can inspire even one person to do the same. More importantly, I want this to be a space where I can show Jesus to others and be unapologetically myself in the process.

    Grief, Reflection, and the Need for Change

    After the assassination of Charlie Kirk, I felt a deep and heavy presence settle over me. It was a dark few days for both my wife and me as we processed the news and mourned the loss of someone we didn’t even know personally, yet whose boldness in faith had made a lasting impact on us.

    We grieved the reality that someone who openly and unapologetically loved God could be killed simply for having a viewpoint that challenged societal norms. That still sickens me. It’s heartbreaking to see how far hatred can go—and even more disheartening to witness people I care about celebrating or justifying it. I saw posts from people I love that completely contradicted the character I thought they had.

    That was my breaking point.

    After much prayer and reflection, I decided to remove myself from platforms like Facebook, Instagram, X (Twitter), and Reddit. I realized I cannot change the hearts of those who are consumed by hate. I cannot stop the celebration of evil. But I can choose what I allow into my heart and mind.

    Maybe that’s the coward’s way out. Or maybe it’s the wise way—the faithful way. Either way, it’s my way, and it’s helping my walk with God.

    I do still have Instagram, but I’m extremely selective about who I follow. It’s curated to protect my emotional health and spiritual well-being. I know myself, and I know what feeds or depletes my spirit.

    A Prayer for You

    My prayer today is simple: for you and your spiritual health. I pray you know—truly know—that God loves you. He sent His Son to die in your place, for a death that you and I rightfully deserved. The cross was meant for sinners like us, not for the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. And yet, He bore it willingly.

    Below is a prayer from my heart to yours. I pray it resonates with you, draws you nearer to God, and reminds you that you’re not alone in this world. I may not have all the answers, but I have a direct line to the One who does. And I’m always here to pray with you, in any season, in any circumstance.

    “Heavenly Father,

    Thank You. Above all else, we come before You with grateful hearts. Thank You for the gift of another day on this side of eternity—a day filled with purpose, a day full of grace. The very breath in our lungs and the steady beat of our hearts are reminders that You are not finished with us yet.

    Lord, I lift up every soul reading these words. I pray they come to know the depth of Your love, the power of Your mercy, and the truth that You alone are the Way, the Truth, and the Life. You are the Lord of Lords, the only path to salvation, and in You we place our trust.

    Father, forgive us. Wash us clean of our sins, our trespasses, and every moment we’ve fallen short of Your glory. We repent and turn our hearts back to You. We ask for Your guidance—soften our hearts and open our ears, that we may clearly hear Your voice and walk boldly in Your will.

    We love You, Lord, and we thank You—for who You are, and for all You’ve done.

    In Jesus’ name,
    Amen.”

    Know this: God loves you. I love you. And I am praying for you.

    I Love you! – Austin B. Grant

  • The Introduction

    Hello and welcome! My name is Austin Grant, and if I’m being honest, I’m what you might affectionately call a mess-and-a-half. Life has taken me through quite a journey, full of unexpected turns, hard lessons, and beautiful redemptions — and at the center of it all is grace.

    I am incredibly blessed to be married to my best friend and the absolute love of my life, Abigail. She is the kind of person who walks into a room and fills it with light — gentle, strong, deeply kind, and wise beyond her years. We met in 2023 during one of the most turbulent seasons of my life. I was walking through a divorce, trying to pick up the pieces of who I was, and truthfully, I was a bit lost — hungry for connection, healing, and someone to see me fully and love me anyway.

    When I say I hit the jackpot, I mean it in the truest sense. God brought Abigail into my life not just as a companion, but as a mirror, a challenger, and a source of profound growth. She challenges me emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually, and she loves me fiercely — not despite my mess, but through it. Words fall short of expressing just how deeply I appreciate her.

    We also share our home with our sweet and spirited dog, Wednesday — a constant source of joy and laughter in our daily lives.

    Both Abigail and I are followers of Christ, and our marriage is rooted in our shared faith. That foundation has carried us through the highs and lows, and we are thrilled to have found what feels like our church home here in Dallas. It’s a place where we can grow, serve, and be poured into, and we’re genuinely excited to see what this next chapter holds.

    This space is where I hope to share my thoughts, my prayers, and my reflections — for myself, for you, for my family and friends, and for our country. I’m no expert, and I won’t pretend to have it all together, but I believe there’s beauty in vulnerability and power in prayer. Thank you for being here — stay tuned, and may grace and peace be with you.

    I love you! – Austin B. Grant